Phantom Pain

 AUTHORS NOTES:

        Written in 2022. This describes my anxiety about the crush/romantic relationships I have or had. I always have the issue of thinking about how it could develop and even die before even talking to the person.



Phantom pain


She walks in with her hair in a bun

It’s messy, but that resembles her life

At least for today.


The cafe is warm and inviting for that purpose,

To inspire the sweatpants and basic shirt,

That also inspires the drink.


She sits and sips, 

Looks and listens,

Studies and critisizes,

Learns.


She sees a boy,

Handsome and innocent,

Who smiles at her as he goes,

And breath becomes scarce.


Her fascination takes hold,

Fixates,

To find a psychic answer.


She looks into the fictional future,

To find the words that will last,

And that will make him do the same.


He spots her,

Asks her her name,

What she is drinking,

And finds common ground.


They exchange numbers,

Go on dates, 

Have the first kiss,

Start getting intimate, 

Then he leaves her for another.


The boy gets in line to order,

Tousling his hair, 

Looking around,

Looking at her?


She gets up and bumps into him by mistake,

She apologizes,

He apologizes,

He asks her her name,

And finds common ground.


They exchange numbers,

Go on dates, 

Have the first kiss,

Start getting intimate, 

Then she sees all the red flags.


He takes a few steps forward closer,

Moving up the slow line,

Crowded in front of the barista,

Waiting.


He asks to sit with her,

That she looks lonely,

She accepts,

She asks him his name,

and finds common ground.


They exchange numbers,

But he decides,

To just stay friends.


He is next to order,

Asking the barista with poise,

Friendliness,

And turns to the waiting area.


She gets up to leave,

Arms full with necessary items,

Walks to the door,

And drops her phone.


The boy walks over,

Picks up her phone and hands it over,

She thanks him,

Asks him his name,

And finds common ground.


They exchange numbers,

Go on dates, 

He doesn’t like her.


He grabs his drink,

Walks near her, 

But now she is not watching.


In that span of time,

He ordered,

Waited, 

Gotten his drink,

Too late.


The girl had already gotten close to him,

Learned to love him,

Just to be heartbroken,

And they never even exchanged glances.


Poems, Short Stories

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